Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Diploid Blood Seed

comic book idea:Diploid Blood Seed
Before you ask any questions let me explain why we require everyone working here to wear jock straps and protective cups. A low level scientist at this nano tech facility accidentally implanted a nano intelligence in to his testicles creating hybrid sperm gelatinous intelligence.
The scientist, who was seriously bored out of his mind, accidentally dropped a syringe on his crotch nailing his left testicle. He knew what was going to happen next, because he had done it to so many other random things for his job. The shock of stabbing himself in the nuts with experimental materials never kicked in.
The nano intelligence pairs up with whatever substance it is injected into creating an adhoc intelligent being. The scientist's greatest success had been a jar of peanut butter that could play a mean game of chess. Unfortunately no one in the lab had any interest in chess and they had eventually spread the peanut butter on toast and ate it. Partially to test for an emotional response from the peanut butter. Mostly it was for their own morbid amusement, because nobody likes it when a jar of peanut butter beats you at a board game.
Within a day of the injection the testicles had learned rudimentary responses, such as no, and more. The scientist is amused by this and notes that upon orgasmic completion of masturbation the testicles become belligerent like a drunk.
After 3 days the testicles had reached equal to or greater than the intelligence of the peanut butter. This fact was never tested because the scientist had no interest in playing chess against his own balls.
An unfortunate side effect began five days after the injection. The nano intelligence started to expand giving the scientist testicles the size of grape fruits. It was very hard for the scientist to hide this fact at work, even with the large lab coats provided. A sexual harassment suit is pending.
The scientist stayed home for the weekend as the testicles had become so big he could no longer contain them in his pants. While it had become enjoyable to watch the testicles play xbox live, the trash talking was starting to effect his gamer rep. Masturbation was no longer an option at this point.
Eight days after the injection. The scientist is awoken in the morning by a testicular form that measures nearly the same size as an adult male. Before the scientist can reach the phone to finally report the problem to work, the testicles did something unusual.
The testicles stretched, and pulsated, and screamed. The scientist also screamed. Limbs suddenly tore themselves free from the scientist's extraordinarily stretched out ball sack. A head slowly looked up from the large testicular humanoid form.
"hello my name is Bob," the testicular form stated.
The scientist laid there silent in his now fully soiled bed.
"it is a pleasure to finally look you in the face," grunted Bob now with a little more attitude. For a moment the Testicular form known as Bob seemed to hesitate. Then Bob said,"this is for last week."
Bob picked up the horrified scientist by the torso. Then shook the scientist up and down mercilessly until the scientist vomited all over the bed.
Bob was last seen on surveillance footage taken from a gas station near the scientist's apartment. It appeared as though Bob was wearing a spare Lab coat. It is not yet determined if the Testicular form known as Bob is still gaining greater intelligence, because the accident will not be repeated for scientific study.


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